2020 – The Year of Abby

For such an eventful year, it was a ball of fur that made it

2020 – The Year of Abby
Spoilers… but that’s Abby!

‘Tis the season for annual reviews, wherein folks who have access to a text box to write in will comment on the calendar year prior. You’ll likely come across jokes about how intense/terrible/long this particular year has been. Some may try to shine a positive light on the future or point out the everyday joys that still occur. Most will include their own personal angle and share their individual struggles, growth, and more mundane goings-on. I’ve done plenty of that in years past, and while the only thing that will really change after this Thursday strikes midnight is that Friday will start, I won’t deny that it can still be fun (or cathartic) to recount the emotional struggles of the past 365 days and to wax poetic on the year ahead.

But today I’m just gonna talk about my cat.

Oh, and if you don’t care about the story (how dare you!), just skip to the end for hilarious/adorable cat pictures.

B.C. (Before Cat)

I’ve always been a dog person. Most cats I’d come across in social situations were aloof at best, mean/insane at worst, and there were literally only a few that I’d gotten along with. I didn’t hate cats, but lovable dogs just generally seemed more my speed.

I married a woman who loves dogs, too, but she also loved her childhood cat, so she straddled the dog/cat border much more evenly than I did. Given our current living situation (apartment, no yard, both working full-time office hours), getting a dog just wasn’t in the cards for us. It was only several months into our marriage, but we were ready to bring another little being into our home to love. Just to be clear, I’m speaking about the four-footed variety, not bipedal and wearing diapers — not yet.

My wife is great, and because I love her and her greatness, I really pushed myself towards the idea of getting a cat. I did the very Mark thing of spending my nights online-reading the heck out of breeds, personalities, and hair types. I browsed all of the adoption sites, trying to find just the right concoction of what I thought might work best. I was really determined to find us a new friend, even if it was a cat that would end up being more my wife’s pet than mine.

We didn’t make it to an earlier adoption event that I had eyeballed when I first started my online searching, so when I saw another one advertised online weeks later, I marked our calendar and made sure we got there.

Feb 29, 2020

Sydney had made plans for us to meet with her mom for lunch that day, and she joined us at the adoption event beforehand. It was inside of a pet store and was already pretty bustling when we arrived. This adoption day was focused on cats, but there were some adorable little dogs outside that were pretty hard to ignore as we walked in.

That wasn’t going to make it any easier on me to find a cat, I thought!

Sydney’s mom was smitten by a very rambunctious kitten there, which was admittedly very adorable in its smallness (but far too bitey and crazy for us to leave at home for hours on end). Pet adoptions make me feel guilty, as if I’m window shopping and trying to make a judgment based first on how cute an animal is and then instinctively wanting to move along if they’re not cute enough in the right way. It’s really tough for me. I saw this one cat in the top row of cages that was curled up and tucked away at the back away from everyone. It looked kind of sad, all alone up there, as if it just wanted to avoid all of this and be loved already.

So, yeah… that’s me at a pet adoption event.

Sydney and I saw a cat that was pretty cute and took an interest in us as we spent some time near its cage. I took a deep breath and asked if we could meet it. We went over to the area where people can sit and get to know the animal a bit better, and this cat was pretty cute and soft, but also pretty bitey as he ran around and played rough with us. And these weren’t just light bites, either, as I painfully discovered. The adoption gal described that cat as pretty full of energy, as we could see, and even if I was going to give in on this one for Sydney’s sake (she thought the cat was fun), that cat just wasn’t going to do well with how much alone time we’d be giving him.

It was with a heavy sigh that we had to move on and pass on adopting that cat, but before we got up and left, I saw a new couple sit in front of us. They were meeting with the sad, top-row cat I’d seen earlier. At least the 3 of them were getting a happy story, I hoped, and that made things a little easier for me. We looked around at some of the other cats there, but hunger was calling, so we decided to leave.

Lunch was tasty, fun, and distracting, but something was gnawing at me. I couldn’t drop the feeling that we should go back and see that sad, top-row cat. I had actually really wanted to meet it, but that other couple had gotten to it first and we had to get to lunch before “hangry” became a thing. So, as we drove home after our meal, I told Sydney, “Let’s go back to the event. We’ll just dash in; if that sad cat is gone, we’ll leave, if it’s there, we’ll at least see.”

By that time, the crowds at the store had subsided. Many of the adoption cages were empty or had “Adopted!” cards on their doors. I may have played it cool in the paragraphs above, but ya know what? I was absolutely drawn to that sad, top-row cat! I really wanted to meet it, I wanted to see if maybe that shy cat might be for us, so as we walked back into the store my heart was beating.

And there, curled up still in the top row, was that sad, reserved cat — still alone and still unclaimed!

Meeting Abby

This cat was an adorable light orange with white patches. The adoption worker took her out of her cage by simply bundling her bed around her and carrying her over to us. The cat’s name was Abby. She looked tired, but a little scared, too. She was mellow, though, even in her uncertainty. Sydney sat with her first, and Abby was just curled up on the bed in her lap. Abby had a fun, faint ring pattern on her tail. We were the only ones looking at a cat by that point, and we just sat there with her for a long time. I would tell you that I fell in love then, but that would be a lie.

I’d actually fallen in love when I first saw that cat hiding away in her top-row cage. 🙂

The slightest amount of tears formed in mine and Sydney’s eyes as I held this sweet little animal and we knew she was the one. After filling out the necessary info, payment, and buying a few necessities, we were on our way home with our new cat.

A New Home

Learning to enjoy some good scratchies on day 2

Back at our apartment, we closed our hallway doors and let Abby out of her carrying cage for the first time. She was pretty shy, and eventually dashed out and hid behind the toilet. The adoption gal told us that’s where she’d first hidden when being fostered, so we made it an available option for her that first day.

We didn’t crowd Abby, and just tried to gently coax her out with food and a toy. She stayed hidden for a while, but I sat with her — far enough to not make her nervous, but close enough that she knew I was there for her. Eventually she peeked out a bit, and slowly but surely over the rest of the day, she got more used to us and realized we were her new peeps.

I’ll save you from having to read about every little milestone, and not just because I’ve forgotten them, but one of my fondest memories of those first few days was waking up early in the morning and not being able to find Abby anywhere. We don’t exactly have a large apartment, but I looked everywhere I could think of: under the couch, behind doors, in any little spot I could imagine her fitting.

Abby had apparently vanished into thin air.

I called out to Sydney, letting her know that our new cat seemingly knew how to open doors and decided we were lame and left us. We both tore the place apart, until one of our kitchen cabinets made a faint noise. Abby had managed to open one of the cabinet doors and sneak way back into the dark corner. We ended up putting heavy objects in front of the cabinets for a while, and now have childproof push-locks, but even today we’ll still occasionally hear her test the cabinet door to see if it might open this time.

Pandemic! …and not the board game

Abby keeping me company while Sydney worked, hours before CA lockdown

If you’re tracking along, you may realize that we brought our cat home less than 3 weeks before California enacted its initial COVID-19 stay at home order on March 19. Sydney had started working from home before the state order was officially in place, and I was then on a temporary hiatus while my company figured out how we were going to do things going forward, so Abby went from both of us being gone for 8+ hours during the day to us suddenly being around. All day. Every day.

She didn’t seem to mind in the slightest, though. 🙂

The best cat in the world

Supervising creation of the most recent Out of the Box comic

Within days of bringing her home, Abby revealed just how sweet and cuddly she is. Her play needs are minimal, she only love-bites (and never hard), and I’ve only managed to make her hiss a few times because I accidentally startled her. What she does do, though, is snuggle. I have never known a cat so gentle and sweet, and I can’t begin to express just how lucky we are. I couldn’t have dreamed up a better personality for a pet if I’d tried. No pet can objectively be claimed “the best,” but Abby sure is the best for us!

At first, Abby was pretty obsessed with Sydney, but she and I still had our own special bond. I was the one to discover a few of Abby’s favorite things, like how blissed out she gets by my scratching the bridge of her nose or rubbing just inside her ears. I’m the night owl of the home, a trait that was only exasperated when I didn’t have work to get up for anymore, so Abby has spent plenty of time being my late-night gaming or writing partner — curled up on the ground next to me or right on my lap as I go about my computing. I won’t gush about her too much, though, because I’m sure you don’t care about how much she loves chomping on cardboard or watching birds. And if you do, just ask me and I’ll gush away. 🙂

Today, coming up towards a year from we brought her home, there is no question just how much this darn cat loves us. If I’m taking a lazy morning in and Sydney gets up first, Abby will run over to see me and snuggle up on my bedding with me. Whenever Sydney even moves towards the couch, Abby perks up at the idea of upcoming couch-snuggles. We’ve only had one other person over since we adopted her, and even then it was only a brief visit by Sydney’s brother before lockdown to make use of our bathroom, but Abby was pretty sweet with him, too, so I look forward to having others come over one day and experiencing this adorable little ball of fur that is my best buddy.

And that’s what she is — my best buddy. I love this cat, in ways that I haven’t quite loved an animal before. Part of that is that I’ve never felt this much love from an animal before. My childhood dog was great, we were the classic “a boy and his dog,” but even she didn’t quite adore me as much as this snuggle-muffin that is my lil’ Abby does. This cat has brought something new out of me, as well — a fatherly instinct. I’m married now, we’re settled into a good life, and having this sweet little creature adore me so much has really rustled up feelings in me that I haven’t felt in this way before. Whether I’m tucking her into bed at night with a smooch on the head or holding myself in a somewhat uncomfortable position simply because she’s contentedly resting her head on my arm, I’ve tapped into a new level of fatherly-type affection.

Hmm, so maybe we’re gonna have to start looking into getting one of those bipedal beings in diapers sooner rather than later after all… 😉

A great year

Obviously, 2020 has been a pretty monumental year, and you don’t need me to tell you why. Years from now, though, when I look back at this time I’m going to remember quarantine, sure, but I’m going to remember spending it with my wife and our wonderful cat.

In fact, Abby is sitting on my lap right now as I type these words. Abby, anything to add?

*hands cat the keyboard*

*cat sniffs the Alt key and purrs in content disinterest*

Well… sounds about right. 🙂

Bonus pictures

P.S. – It’s been a long absence, but we’ll see if we can’t fix this site up proper again and get back to it regularly again!